Walking Through the Noise

There’s something about a morning walk that shifts the energy, it invites clarity, offers a quiet sense of accomplishment, and sets the tone for the day ahead. It’s simple, accessible, and yet deeply grounding. Today, that walk reminded me how important it is to create space to just begin, especially when the weight of the world is whispering otherwise.

As month-end rolls in, so do the reminders: bills, responsibilities, the ever-present need to re-evaluate. It's easy to feel the pressure. This season demands adjustments, scrutinizing what’s essential, trimming back where we must, and being honest about what truly serves us.

What I continue to wrestle with, though, is the rigidity of routine. I try to start my mornings in the same way, but some days… the rhythm is off. Mood shifts creep in. Focus scatters. Grief or uncertainty rises quietly. And I’ve learned not to fight those moments, but to feel them.

In those pockets of emotional haze, I reach for what soothes me:
→ A walk.
→ A dance break in the kitchen.
→ A few deep breaths or gentle stretches.
→ A warm conversation with someone who gets it.

These tiny resets don’t fix everything, but they anchor me. They remind me that it’s okay to be both resilient and tender. That we’re not meant to be machines moving through to-do lists on autopilot. We are human. Complex, emotional, and beautifully breakable.

So if you find yourself swinging between motivation and stillness, energy and fatigue, you’re not alone. That’s part of the process. Part of the rise.

And when the storm feels like it might never pass, remember this:
Calm seas are not a myth, they’re on their way.

My mantra for the day 💗
"My rhythm is allowed to change. I honor where I am, and I keep moving forward."

~ Nerusha

Reclaiming Focus, Redefining Worth

 

There was a quiet hope that came with this morning’s sunrise. A gentle promise that today could be different, and that intention carried me into motion. I started my Sunday with a run, letting the rhythm of my feet on the pavement set the pace for the week ahead.

I sat down to outline my goals for the coming days: admin tasks, upskilling, job searches, refining what truly needs my attention. I want to hit the ground running, not with panic, but with purpose.

Retrenchment has a way of shifting everything. It doesn’t just impact income; it shakes the stories we tell ourselves about our worth. There’s a harmful narrative out there, one that paints those of us in transition as desperate, even diminished. As though our value suddenly disappears the moment our title does.

But I’m not subscribing to that.

Instead, I’ve chosen to conduct a life audit. I’m asking real questions, What isn’t serving me anymore? What habits, relationships, or beliefs need to be released? I'm reassessing my finances, my circle, my goals, and the kind of career that aligns with who I truly am, and who I’m becoming.

Truthfully, I almost accepted something I knew wasn’t right. I nearly settled out of fear. But I caught myself. Because just being retrenched doesn't mean you have to settle for less. Your experience is valid. Your skills are still sharp. Your essence remains intact.

Stand firm. Don’t let circumstances rewrite your worth. What is meant for you will come, and perseverance is the vehicle that will take you there.

So this week, I’m moving forward with laser focus. Grounded in purpose. Fueled by the knowing that I’m not starting from nothing, I’m starting from experience.

Let’s go get what’s ours.

~Nerusha

Crisp Air & Quiet Wisdom

 

This morning arrived with the sharp chill of winter, a fresh breeze swirling through the promenade as I laced up and set out for my walk. It would’ve been easy to stay curled up indoors, but I stuck to my rhythm. There’s something undeniably special about the early morning air, the way the crispness wakes you up from the inside out, as if each breath is a quiet reset.

Weekends are usually reserved for connection, family, friends, and that intentional pause from the weekday hustle. Today was no different. Even though I’d promised myself a break from the job hunt, my mind, true to form, wandered back to it now and then. Still, I held the line. I gave myself the grace to just be.

What truly made the day was meeting up with the team I first joined at Derivco, colleagues who, nine years later, have become dear friends. Sharing a meal with them, reminiscing about those early days, laughing over stories only we could truly appreciate… it was more than comforting. It was grounding. A reminder that time doesn’t undo real connection, it deepens it.

This week has offered a quiet but powerful lesson, sometimes the smallest act, a check-in, a shared coffee, a warm smile, can leave the biggest imprint. Never underestimate the power of your presence. Being available. Being kind. Being willing to just sit in someone else's space. Those moments often mean more than we realise.

Some friendships remain long after work emails fade. And in those moments of reconnection, we remember, we were never just building systems or shipping projects. We were building something human too.

¬Nerusha

A Strange Kind of Wealth

 

My day began as it usually does at 5 a.m., quiet streets, morning stillness. But today, something felt different. When I saw the final salary payout hit my account, the reality of it all landed with more weight than I expected. There was this strange moment where I felt both rich and poor at the same time. Funny, isn’t it, how a single notification can stir so much?

After my walk, I met up with a former colleague, now friend and we caught up over coffee. She’s a mum of two, juggling life’s chaos with unwavering strength. Her ability to keep pushing forward, even in the midst of uncertainty, was a quiet spark of inspiration that lit something in me. It reminded me just how powerful it is to have a sense of purpose, to let that inner flame keep burning, even when the wind picks up.

The day unfolded with a productive rhythm, a pleasant meeting, financial overviews, a few unexpected tasks, rather busy, but fulfilling. At every step, there was support, guidance, and a reminder that I’m not navigating this path alone. And for that, I’m deeply grateful.

One curveball though.... An interview with an AI bot. Weird. Surreal. A bit like talking into a mirror that talks back, but politely. The future is definitely digital, and we’re all going to have to get used to the Avery's, Zara's, and Alexa's of the world. It was a reminder that the landscape is shifting, and we’re shifting with it.

All in all, today was full, of change, connection, and progress. A week that started uncertainly ends on a hopeful note. And as I step into the weekend, my heart is full of gratitude. For the people, the movement, the grace, and the continued unfolding of something I may not yet fully see, but trust is on its way.

~ Nerusha

When Time Slips and Stillness Speaks

Today moved quickly, so quickly, it felt like it slipped right through my fingers. Hours blurred, and by evening, I found myself wondering, have I done enough? The to-do list still looms, tangled in a hundred suggestions and expectations. It’s easy to get pulled into everything I should be doing, while the things that truly matter quietly wait in the background.

Some days feel heavier than others, weightier in ways I can’t always explain. The mental noise grows louder, and staying focused becomes a quiet, private battle. But even in the midst of that chaos, something soft breaks through, a kind message, an unexpected check-in, an act of grace wrapped in simplicity.

It’s in those moments that I’m reminded to pause. To give thanks. To remember that even when the day feels scattered, the heart can still be anchored.

And so, I keep going, one breath, one act, one step, grounded in gratitude for another chance to rise.

You are doing enough. Rest, then rise.

To those navigating a similar season, feeling stretched, unsure, or just quietly tired, this is your reminder: you’re not alone. We’re figuring it out together.

What has helped you stay steady when the pace feels unrelenting? What quiet comfort carried you today?

Your words may be just what someone else needs to read.

~Nerusha

The Quiet Light That Moves Us Forward

Today was a mix of many things, a prayer for my late Ma, a catch-up with a former colleague turned close friend, a test for a course I just completed, and ongoing chats with recruiters… all while continuing to navigate the job search and upskilling journey. It felt like a lot. Each moment asked something different of me, pulling my attention in multiple directions. I’m learning to adapt, to breathe through the overwhelm, and to find my rhythm in this new norm.

But somewhere between the checklists and challenges, today taught me to slow down and give thanks. To appreciate the simple things, like getting in the car to meet a friend for coffee, or walking along the promenade just to reconnect with myself. Moments that feel small but are, in fact, everything.

These last two weeks of increased flexibility have gifted me the chance to reconnect, with loved ones, close friends, even former colleagues. In those conversations, I’ve heard their stories, shared in their struggles, and found comfort in the shared humanity of it all. It’s reminded me that we are all navigating something. And sometimes, simply listening or being present is the most powerful thing we can offer.

We often underestimate how far compassion goes. A thoughtful message, a shared laugh, a moment of honesty, it has a ripple effect. And in a world that can feel increasingly disconnected, choosing to show up for one another is a quiet act of rebellion. A radical return to what truly matters.

And through it all, my friends, those who’ve offered support in ways big and small, have become the quiet fuel keeping me moving forward. Their kindness, consistency, and presence have lit the path ahead, especially when my own light has flickered. With every message, every check-in, every reminder that I am not alone, they’ve helped guide me closer to my truth, my purpose, and the role that aligns with all that I am becoming. That kind of support? It’s sacred.

Who grounded you today, and how can you be that presence for someone else tomorrow?

~Nerusha

Redefining the Routine

Today, I started with intention. As I mapped out my day, as I usually do, I set one clear goal: to complete my online training practice exercises. It might sound simple, but the discipline to stay focused when your inbox buzzes with job alerts and the pressure to react immediately sets in... that’s a real challenge.

There’s a pull to always be “on”, refreshing job boards, replying instantly, chasing every possible lead. But what I’m learning is that hustle without intention burns fast. Sometimes we need to pause, breathe, and realign. Less panic, more purpose.

In that spirit, I stepped away from the screen and invested in something that will serve me down the line, interview-appropriate attire. My wardrobe, rooted in years of workplace casual, needed a refresh. It may seem like a small step, but it symbolized so much, readiness, optimism, and showing up for the version of me that’s already rising.

I also sat down and made a list of companies I’d love to work for, thinking beyond conventional job boards and tapping into networks, values, and missions that resonate. My advice? Think outside the box. There’s a vast landscape out there, and IT skills are in demand across sectors, don’t limit yourself to what’s familiar.

A conversation with a loved one offered timely wisdom “Use this time to redefine what you want. The sky’s the limit.” Maybe that sounds wildly optimistic, but maybe that’s exactly the energy this season calls for. When we shift from scarcity to possibility, from fear to curiosity, we start to open doors we didn’t even know were there.

So here’s to redefining, not just how we job hunt, but how we dream. The opportunity isn’t just to find work, but to find alignment. Maybe even a new reality.

What’s one small shift you could make today to support the reality you’re working toward?

Pause, reflect, and take that step

~Nerusha

Charting a Course for Growth

As I step into a new work week, I’m doing so with intention, to expand my skill set, identify areas of growth, and reconnect with those who’ve journeyed beside me. There’s something deeply empowering about choosing to show up each day, grounded in gratitude, guided by hope, and trusting that what’s meant for me will unfold in its time.

Times of challenge and uncertainty have a way of revealing truths. Some relationships, rooted in authenticity, rise with us, offering comfort and encouragement. Others, under the weight of hardship, begin to shift or fall away. Each one leaves something behind. Every exchange, whether gentle or jarring, reveals who I am, who I’m becoming, and what truly aligns with my purpose.

No relationship is ever in vain. Each one tests our resilience, shapes our values, and redefines what gives our lives meaning.

This week, I’ve carved out space not only for professional and academic development, but also for reflection, a quiet space to ask myself better questions, to realign and simply be. I believe clarity is born in stillness, and that when we trust in something greater than ourselves, the pieces start to come together. There are higher powers at play. And for that, I remain hopeful.

One of the highlights this week was reconnecting with former colleagues. Sitting around a table with coffee and conversation reminded me how much joy lives in the simple things. Shared stories, familiar laughter, knowing glances, they brought comfort and belonging. It reaffirmed that connection doesn’t end with the title on your email signature. It endures.

That support wasn’t just comforting, it was anchoring. A reminder that even in the midst of uncertainty, community offers stability. Sometimes reassurance doesn’t come through solutions, but through presence. And more often than not, that’s exactly what we need.

This week, I lead with intention and receive with grace.

~Nerusha

Recalibrating on a Sunday

For me, Sundays have quietly become a sacred pause, a time to recalibrate before the week begins. Today, I laced up and went for a run. It's been a while since I truly challenged myself in this way, and honestly, it felt incredible. There’s something about moving your body with intention that reminds you, you’re still here, still rising.

One of my family members joined me, and we found ourselves motivating each other stride for stride. It was a reminder that support systems matter. Deeply. The people who walk (or run) beside you, encouraging you forward, are essential in pushing you beyond what you thought you could do.

But sometimes, receiving help requires vulnerability. We often guard ourselves in the name of strength, but in truth, it’s when we allow others in that the real strength unfolds. As Brené Brown reminds us, “Vulnerability is the birthplace of innovation, creativity, and change.” And I’ve seen that in motion, there’s a kind of freedom and growth that only comes when you let go of trying to do it all alone.

Another small yet powerful shift I made today: tidying and decluttering my workspace. A clean, fresh environment instantly lifted my mood and brought clarity. When your space feels light, so does your mindset, and that’s exactly the kind of energy we need as we search for what’s next.

So here’s to a new week, rooted in support, lifted by presence, and guided by intentional focus.

Let this be your reminder, recalibrate, breathe deep, and go get them.

~Nerusha

Finding Flow in Stillness

Weekends have taken on new meaning lately, less about catching up and more about grounding. A time for connection, stillness, and presence. For reaching out to loved ones and reaching inward, too.

Today is International Yoga Day, and I marked it in the most meaningful way: slowing down. I spent time with friends and family, unrolled my mat, and let myself settle into the moment. No urgency. No striving. Just breath, presence, and gentle movement.

Yoga reminded me, again, why practices like this are so powerful. They cultivate calm. They shift focus back to what truly matters. They hold space for gratitude. As I moved through my flow, a quote I recently read echoed in my mind:
“Don’t force what is not flowing.”

That truth landed deeply. Trusting that what’s meant for us won’t need to be chased—it will meet us where we are, and it will feel like peace.

As I breathed and stretched, the message became clear: Let go of what no longer fits. Create space for what’s rising. This season is not just about career transitions, it’s about spiritual alignment, energetic clarity, and choosing softness over struggle.

The ride continues, fast and full. But even within the momentum, we’re allowed to pause. To reset. To remember that flow is not a destination, it’s a return.

Today, I choose presence over pressure.

~Nerusha

When Therapy Walks Beside You

 

This morning, during my daily walk, I crossed paths with a former colleague, someone who, like me, was part of the retrenchment wave. What started as a casual “hello” turned into something more: a walk-and-talk where therapy met therapy.

As we shared our stories, what stood out wasn't the differences in our situations, but the striking similarities in how we were experiencing this transition. Different roles, different paths, but the emotions? They echoed each other. The sense of loss, uncertainty, and disorientation. The quiet fear mixed with cautious hope. We were both living it, just like so many others are right now.

With a background in Psychology, mental health has always been close to my heart. And in this moment, it struck me how deeply retrenchment mirrors other forms of grief. Losing your job is not just a financial hit, it’s an emotional unraveling. It affects how you think, how you focus, how you show up. Just when you’re expected to be at your sharpest, job hunting, networking, pitching yourself, you’re often at your most mentally and emotionally drained.

It makes me wonder: Do companies truly consider this when they retrench skilled staff in masses? Beyond the spreadsheets and legal processes, do they see the human cost?

Would it not make a difference to have grief counselling on site, to offer even a basic framework for healing and clarity in the aftermath? Or were we simply numbers all along, while the word “People” remained etched on the walls we passed daily, more slogan than ethos?

Yet here’s the truth that’s become so clear: the “People” have always been the people. The ones left behind, as well as those affected before us, they’re the ones who have shown up. They’ve rallied, reached back, and extended hands in support. You are the quiet heroes. I see you. I salute you. For your compassion, your humanity, and your effort to remind us we’re not alone. Your thoughtfulness and kindness are keeping so many of us going.

Thank you. You are the proof that empathy still has a pulse in this world.

Sometimes it takes a morning walk to realize you’re not walking this road by yourself after all.

~Nerusha

Letting Go of Tiara

Morning walk - check ✔. 

There’s something about early light and quiet streets that wakes up my spirit. It’s that energy I’ve come to rely on lately, especially as I navigate this season of uncertainty.

Today held something different: I met with a potential buyer for one of my cars. It’s part of the process, shedding, simplifying, pulling in funds where I can. Operating in this in-between space means making choices that aren’t always easy, but they’re necessary.

Saying goodbye to this car felt like the end of an era. I know it’s “just a car,” but she had a name, Tiara, and she was with me through defining moments of my journey. She was memory, movement, and milestones. My zoom zoom...that took me everywhere. I’ve always had a soft spot for things that carry meaning, and Tiara was no different. She held my stories in her seats.

What I’m learning, again, is the quiet art of detachment. Nothing in life is permanent. The journey asks us to keep moving, even when the letting go is tender.

Alongside all this change, I’ve been carving out more space for worship and spiritual alignment. In the stillness, I seek clarity. In prayer, I find guidance. Getting in tune with myself and my purpose has never felt more vital. This transition isn’t just a shift in circumstance, it’s a soulful recalibration.

If you’re in a similar space, I gently encourage you: lean into whatever practice grounds you. Whether it’s meditation, prayer, or simply moments of silence, give yourself the gift of reflection. Anchor your faith. It cultivates the hope and resilience needed to move toward what’s next....what’s meant.

This season is teaching me to walk lighter, trust deeper, and let go with grace. One step, one prayer, one rise at a time.

~Nerusha

Interviewing Again After Nine Years: Lessons from the Deep End

 Today I had my first interview in nine years. Yep, I’m one of those fiercely loyal types who stick it out, until life nudges you in a new direction.

Even preparing for the interview felt like a leap out of my comfort zone. From researching the company to brushing up on common interview questions, even figuring out what to wear (especially after years of casual workplace attire) every part of the prep took thought. Finding something “interview-worthy” in my cupboard became a mission all on its own. Ironically, the preparation lasted longer than the interview itself. But honestly? I see it as a learning curve, one that’s already equipping me for the next opportunity.

One skill I realized I need to sharpen is how to sell myself, how to articulate my value, share my experience confidently, and frame it all in terms of what I can offer a new team. It’s a skill we often overlook when we’re deeply embedded in roles that speak for themselves.

What I’ve taken away is this, nothing done with a teachable mind is ever wasted. Every experience leaves something behind if we’re willing to reflect and take the lessons with us. I’m learning to approach this period of change with openness, welcoming new opportunities, new challenges, and the personal growth that comes with them.

Professionally and individually, this season is shaping me. One conversation at a time.

~Nerusha

Finding Rhythm in the Transition

Starting a new work week, this time on a Tuesday, thanks to the public holiday, brings its own kind of weight. The admin has piled up, a direct result of the retrenchment, and I find myself juggling job applications, emails to agencies, and the ever-growing task of closing skills gaps.

What’s struck me lately is a strange irony, the more specialized you become, the more boxed in you can feel. My past role, while rich in depth, left little space to gain the hands-on experience that broader roles now require. It’s frustrating, realizing that having a solid toolkit doesn’t mean you’ve been given a fair chance to use all your tools. The transition is not just professional, it’s emotional. It’s exhausting.

One thing that has kept me grounded is routine. A friend suggested I work from the coffee shop where she’s based. The change in scenery, the quiet buzz of life around me, and more than anything, having someone there who believes in me makes a difference.

I’ve also started keeping a daily to-do list, a simple diary that structures my day. Each crossed-off task brings a tiny sense of accomplishment, a quiet but steady nudge to keep moving. Morning walks help too, marking a win for my wellbeing right at the start. Even something as small as making my bed sets the tone, “You’ve already achieved something. Now, keep going.”

This approach might not work for everyone. But if you’re navigating change, find your thing. Something that brings momentum. That reminds you you’re not stuck, you’re shifting.

This isn’t the end of the road. It’s a journey, and you get to decide how to walk it. Step by step is still forward. Keep going.

~Nerusha

Embracing the Pause: A Public Holiday Reset

 

Today, the city exhaled with me.

It’s a public holiday, and with no morning rush, a new week too. I gifted myself an early start. The kind that begins not with an alarm, but with intention. A beach walk reminded me that the tides are always shifting,  just like me. Some waves are calm, some crash hard. But there’s always movement, and there’s always return.

This week carries a hefty admin to-do list, but I’m showing up to it with lightness. I’ve penned down what needs doing, and that, in itself, feels like anchoring amidst the unknown. I’m also hopeful for an interview or two. That hope is tender, but it’s there, steady in its own quiet rhythm.

Emotionally? Still a rollercoaster. Some days I’m owning the climb; others, I’m just hanging on. But today, I’m grounded in the positive. That counts. That matters.

A gentle reminder to anyone walking this path alongside me, if you’re navigating this season solo, reach out. A phone call. A visit. A short message. It doesn’t have to be profound, just real. And when you're ready, let yourself speak your truth. Sometimes, voicing it lifts more than the silence ever could.

Here’s to a day that started gently and continues with clarity. The work is ahead, but so is the becoming.

~Nerusha

Job Hunting with Intention: Balancing the Search with Self-Development

Job hunting is, in itself, a full-time job. Between tailoring your CV, applying for roles, and networking, it can feel all-consuming. Staying alert and keeping your ears to the ground is essential, but so is maintaining a sense of balance.

While you’re actively searching for new opportunities, it’s just as important to invest in upskilling. Learning new tools, refining existing skills, or diving into short courses can increase your marketability and confidence. This not only boosts your CV but helps you remain mentally engaged and forward-focused.

But maybe you’re in a different space, one where you’re not just looking for the next job, but questioning what kind of work truly aligns with your values and goals. If so, this is a perfect time to reflect, reset, and redefine your purpose. Journaling, career vision exercises, personality assessments, or even speaking to a coach can help you gain deeper clarity about what’s next.

The key is creating a balanced routine that serves both your goals and your well-being. Structure your days to include job search efforts, personal development, and moments of joy or rest. Don’t let the absence of employment overshadow the richness of your life. Progress is not always visible on paper, but every day invested in yourself is a step forward.

~Nerusha

Reconnecting After Retrenchment: The Healing Power of Support

Retrenchment is never easy. It shakes your routine, your sense of security, and sometimes even your identity. But after allowing yourself the space to process the news, grieve it, sit with it, and reset your focus. One of the most powerful next steps is reconnection.

Reaching out to family and close friends can be deeply grounding. It’s a reminder that you’re not going through this alone. There are people who love you, who want to walk alongside you in this journey, and who offer not just emotional support but perspective. When you’re in the thick of uncertainty, their presence can be a soothing reassurance that life still holds beauty and meaning beyond career titles and job descriptions.

It’s okay to “take a break” from the heaviness. In fact, it’s necessary. Step outside. Take a walk. Go out for that ice cream. Watch your favorite comedy. Enjoy your guilty pleasures without guilt. These moments may seem small, but they’re reminders that even in the midst of change, life continues, and so must we.

This phase is not just about surviving, it’s also about realigning, rediscovering, and yes, even having a little fun along the way. As you slowly gain perspective and clarity, let connection and lightness be part of your healing.

So as you navigate this time, remember to reach out, lean on love, and let joy find its way back in, even in the smallest ways. You are not alone, and this season can be the beginning of something new and meaningful.

An uplifting yet hopeful quote I’d like to leave you with:

“Sometimes the worst thing that happens to you can be the best thing for you—if you let it open your heart, not close it.” — Unknown

~Nerusha

Today’s Financial Reset: One Step at a Time and Staying Proactive in the Job Hunt

 

Had a check-in with my financial advisor today, diving deep into my updated budget. I’m looking carefully at what can be adjusted—pausing my personal RA contributions, downgrading medical aid, and staying sharply aware of the broader economic shifts and interest rates. It’s all about leveraging what I can, where I can.

I'm also exploring investments that can support me sustainably while creating room to find my next job opportunity. The plan’s taking clearer shape: refining tasks, ticking off the to-do list. Things like transferring the company pension, finalizing medical aid, handling UIF, and investing the severance package wisely so it generates interest but remains accessible if needed.

Everyone’s situation is different. Your choices will depend on your responsibilities, priorities, and long-term vision. But if you’re in the thick of it too, just remember—guard your energy, avoid overwhelm, and take each task as it comes.

In between financial planning and reworking the budget, I'm making sure I stay active on the job front too. That means applying directly on company websites as well as using platforms like LinkedIn, Indeed, and Pnet. I’ve set up job alerts for the roles I’m targeting, and I check my emails regularly so nothing slips through the cracks.

Having a copy of my CV saved on my phone makes it easy to apply on the go or send it at short notice. I’m also doing my homework, researching each company before applying, checking out their online presence, reviews, and getting a sense of their culture and values. It's tempting to apply everywhere out of panic, but a scattergun approach can waste time and energy. A little intention goes a long way.

You’ve got this💓

Useful links:

https://www.linkedin.com

https://www.pnet.co.za/

https://za.indeed.com/m/

https://uifonline.labour.gov.za/uifOnline

When the Dust Settles: Life After Retrenchment

Retrenchment is one of those words that lands with a thud. One moment, life moves on familiar tracks. The next, the ground shifts and suddenly, you're standing in the rubble of what was, staring into the unknown of what's next.

While the circumstances were difficult, I made a conscious decision not to let that moment define me. The very next day, I chose action small, clear steps. I updated my CV. I sat with my budget, identifying where I could adjust and pull back. I created a simple to-do list, not to chase productivity for its own sake, but to anchor myself. To move forward, no matter what forward looked like that day.

I kept my story close at first. I wasn’t ready to narrate it to the world, not even to those closest to me. I needed space to feel the weight of what had happened, to let the emotions come without performance. It’s easy to spiral in times like these, to feel untethered, unsure of where to begin. But one truth gently repeated itself to me: what’s done is done. And the only choice left was to keep walking.

What lingered heavily wasn’t just my own circumstance, but the colleagues beside me the ones also retrenched, and those left behind to carry on amid the absence. That grief, that sense of collective loss, is harder to speak about but just as real. It’s not just about jobs it’s about people.

Then came the messages. The calls. Little acts of kindness from friends and former coworkers that reached in and reminded me, I wasn’t alone. There was solidarity in our shared experience, even if every story looked different. It helped me believe, quietly but firmly, that everything will be okay eventually.

This isn't a guide or a lesson. It’s just my truth. If you’re in a similar space, know this, even if today feels like a cliff, tomorrow can be a path. And you’re allowed to take your time finding it.

~Nerusha

A Sunrise After the Storm: My First Day Unemployed Since 16

Today was the first day I woke up unemployed since I was 16 years old. The silence of that reality hit me harder than I expected.

Instead of letting it bury me, I laced up my shoes and walked out into the rising sun.

There’s something profoundly symbolic about a sunrise walk watching the light break through after darkness. And as I walked, thoughts raced through my mind, unfiltered and raw.

The illusion of certainty shattered like glass.

We spend so much time chasing stability. Chasing security. Yet we forget that nothing in life is permanent. Change is the only constant, life is always pulsing between peaks and valleys. Detachment isn’t coldness, it’s clarity. And on this walk, I began to feel that truth deep in my bones.

For the first time in years, I had freedom of choice. Not shackled to a schedule, a structure, or a job title. I wasn’t focused on what was taken from me I was beginning to see what was given to me, a clean slate. An open canvas.

Maybe this isn't the end it’s a new chapter I get to write myself.

We live in a world where people come and go, each leaving a subtle imprint on our lives. And as much as I’ve searched for a sense of belonging, I’ve realized something liberating: you belong to yourself. Anything else, titles, companies, roles, even relationships can shift in a moment. Chasing belonging in impermanent things only leaves us emptier.

This experience didn’t happen by accident. I believe life places us exactly where we need to be, even when we don’t understand why.

It’s like staring at a puzzle piece up close you get lost in its shape, its colors, its jagged edges. But step back? You start to see the bigger picture. With time, reflection, and intention, patterns emerge, and the lesson reveals itself.

Here's one I’m holding onto: If you want to be happy, you’ll find a reason. If you want to be miserable, you’ll find one too. The common denominator is you.

Life will throw bumps, no doubt. That part’s inevitable. But how we navigate them how we carry ourselves through uncertainty is the true test of who we are becoming.

So, I’ll keep walking. And with every sunrise, I’ll paint a little more of the life I actually want.

As a first step toward rebuilding, I did something simple yet deeply important: I reached out to my financial advisor.

I knew I needed clarity not just emotional, but practical. Someone level-headed who could help me zoom out and assess the path forward, piece by piece. The very first thing he said stuck with me:

“Whatever happened is over. There’s absolutely nothing you can do to change it. Now, let’s focus on what comes next and how to move forward in the best way possible.”

In that moment, something shifted. It wasn’t just about finances it was about mindset. I realized how easy it is, in the shock of it all, to spiral, to freeze, to obsess over what’s lost. But taking one intentional step however small can realign your entire perspective.

So if you’re reading this, maybe just freshly retrenched yourself, or feeling untethered, let me say this: you are not alone in the weight of it. Start small. Ask for help. Breathe. There is a next step. And often, it reveals itself when you give yourself permission to simply begin.

~Nerusha

The Exit I Didn’t Choose

 The Day Everything Shifted

The email felt off. The kind you almost delete without opening, vague subject line, strange tone. I assumed it was phishing or maybe some odd internal error. But something urged me to open it.

It was real.

Later that day, we were summoned to the boardroom. No explanation. No context. Just a line of colleagues walking in, heads tilted in confusion. We still had no idea what was coming.

And then... the announcement. Cold. Clinical. Delivered like it was just another line item on someone's calendar. In a few sentences, hundreds of livelihoods were swept away. My stomach turned. The dissonance between the sterile delivery and the gravity of the news was nauseating.

Shock set in numbing, disorienting. I’d spent nine years pouring my energy, growth, and passion into this place. Now it would exist only in memory. The hallways, the inside jokes, the daily rituals, the pride in our work gone.

What hit hardest wasn’t just the loss of a role. It was the goodbye I never saw coming. The incredible people I worked alongside experts in their field, mentors, allies were more than colleagues. They’d become friends. Confidants. A lifeline during some of life’s toughest moments. Saying goodbye to them was like tearing away a part of myself.

The timing cut especially deep. I was already carrying personal grief. And now, this professional loss piled on top of it, becoming another chapter of heartbreak. The emotional weight was crushing fear, disbelief, sorrow, and uncertainty crashing over me all at once.

This wasn’t just a job. It was a second home. A family. And in a single moment, it all unraveled.

The pace at which we had to leave was deeply unsettling quietly heartbreaking and almost too much to absorb all at once. I felt a heavy cloud settle over me, a mix of sadness, fatigue, and confusion. But more than anything, there was an unmistakable sense of loss that lingered long after the moment had passed.

~Nerusha